It’s not Kaidence.  It’s not Kai.  And thank heavens she kept poor Clementine from bastardization with a K.

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West have evidently chosen the cheeky North to add to his surname.  According to People Magazine, this is the name on the birth certificate at Cedars Sinai Hospital.  ETA E! Entertainment News, Kardashian’s host channel, is also reporting now that she is North West, no middle name.  They might have considered a double middle name, South Easton, perhaps?   If this is indeed it, trademarks and domain names will be a trick.  Although “North by North West” might still be available in certain genres aside from film…

Their baby will at least have some direction in life.  How awesome would it be if she grew up to be a crunchy Doc Marten sporting hippy on the Oregon Coast? It would also be nice if the child can always listen to her own true north if you catch my meaning.  I guess if they have another child this really only leaves South (South By South had become a running joke for this babe), East, or Easton, which they actually love.

Kim indeed did throw us a red herring, as she denied that North was even in the running.  Many people thought at the very least it would be something like Knorth.  It’s much more gender neutral than I might have expected, and really quite simple, beyond the obvious pun.  Maybe my compass is off, but I don’t actually hate it.

Welcome little North West, A.K.A. “Nori.”  We can get back to regular programming now, and rest easy knowing that our choices are likely still safe from going the way of celebribaby.  That’s all I really cared about anyway.

20 Responses to “Kim Kardashian’s Baby Name. For Real. I Think.”

  1. Jaime Says:

    I think it’s awful…North on its own it’s horrible, but the choppy flow and the silly directional theme with their surname make it truly cringe-worthy for me. I can’t believe they actually surprised me with something worse than I expected from them. Nori is kind of cute but I don’t even hold any hope they’d use it as a nickname.

  2. Kari Says:

    I can’t stand it, either. Poor baby!

  3. Sarah Says:

    I’m sorry, I love offbeat names, but that is just awful! Naming someone for their lifetime is an honour and a pretty big deal. To fob it off as a joke or an attempt at a play on words is just hideous. Poor little thing. Not that it stood a chance with those two as parents.

  4. Awkward Turtle Says:

    I’ll just pretend it’s Eleanor Donda, known as Nora or Nori as a family nickname.

    Mmmmm. That’s better.

  5. Waltzing More Than Matilda Says:

    Nori is a type of seaweed …. you eat it in sushi.

    I did wonder about rumours of another K name, as that would have made the family initials KKK (until they had another child).

  6. Waltzing More Than Matilda Says:

    * which the media would no doubt have picked up on for headlines, with their penchant for celeb nicknames.

    “KKK visit LA’s All-Day Wonderway” etc etc

  7. Katharine Says:

    Kim and Kanye should go straight to the top of any poll of the weird and wonderful names celebrities call their children (and slightly to the left of course!)
    …And that’s the trouble isn’t it? People will ridicule this choice because it is quite frankly ridiculous. How can anyone be so fame hungry that they would bestow such a name on their child. I usually always look for the positives in bizarre celeb choices: Apple for example is a wholesome fruit and feels clean, fresh and bright. Blue Ivy is essentially a colour and a plant so really quite a natural, inoffensive choice and she can always go by Ivy if she wants one day. But North West? It’s surely a joke?
    I thought Kim might veer away from the K theme but assumed that her choice would be more feminine than ‘North’ but that’s not the point is it? The point is that North West is ludicrous. Did Kim Kardashian give birth to a baby or a compass?

  8. You Can't Call It "It"! Says:

    Very true, they would have been referred to by the media as KKK. Can you imagine?

  9. You Can't Call It "It"! Says:

    It is, but I think Nori works though. It’s a nickname for Nora and Noreen, and reminds me of Queen Noor. The nickname is rather lovely.

  10. JessicaD Says:

    I am vastly relived that it is not Klementine. Immensely.
    But North? That all? just North. Isn’t that a cruel joke to play on a kid?
    But hey so long as she likes it and leaves the real and fabulous names for the rest of us…

  11. Stef Says:

    North West together is a total joke of a name, of course, but I actually really like North as a name. Am I alone on this?

  12. Lashley Says:

    I’m with you (and Elisabeth, I think). The punny first and last together make me cringe, but I think North on its own is unique and elegant.

  13. Kelly P Says:

    I am actually a bit surprised with myself, but I don’t hate it. I wouldn’t choose North for a daughter, but I like it far better than any of the other names they were reportedly considering (mostly because of the horrible forced K). I do agree that because of her surname it’s a bit much. It’s not a hideous choice though – I certainly like it better than Apple.

  14. Nina Says:

    Her memoirs can be called “North” — by North West.

  15. Katharine Says:

    I agree that the nickname Nori is sweet and that North with any other surname would be ok but with West? No. Just no.

  16. Heather Says:

    I just read that Nori is a compilation of Kim & Kanye’s middle names-Noel and Omari, which gives North a tiny bit more relevance for them. Interesting. I do like Nori for their baby girl.

  17. B'ee Says:

    I like North, unique, and special and Nori is from Japan origins,,

  18. Waltzing More Than Matilda Says:

    I’m bemused as to why North West is being called “ridiculous” in the press, but Blue Carter was pleasing.

    To me, North West is an interesting and evocative phrase, while Blue Carter just sounds like someone driving a cart and getting blue paint tipped on them.

  19. Waltzing More Than Matilda Says:

    Can’t get into it myself, but horses for courses.

    Nori is one of the dwarves in “The Hobbit” too.

  20. Megan Says:

    I was thnking a fashion line or perfume ‘north by North West’!

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